When Alicia was a toddler, to contain her, her mother would create a large, invisible wall anywhere by simply placing a chicken feather on the floor. It became a wall of terror Alicia would not go near. As she grew up, Alicia shrieked at the sight of a feather.
After the family moved to the city, Alicia's fear of feathers became a joke. Even she laughed, when the whole family retold stories of her screams when one of her brothers would tease and throw a chicken feather at her. Alicia finally learned to feign disinterest if she ever came across a feather somewhere. But when she saw one, her stomach constricted, her heart raced, her palms became moist. She didn't, but her impulse was to run.
Luckily, Alicia never ran from a dog either. She was never chased nor bitten, nor did she ever even know a dog. But her fright was monstrous. Whenever she saw someone walking a dog, she crossed the street feeling horror like that of feathers.
Her family eventually respected Alicia's fear of dogs and feathers. No feathers were ever placed near her, all dogs were locked away from her.
When Alicia became too old to live alone, she had to move in with a daughter and her huge German Shepherd dog. No one knew how to resolve the problem, but sometimes solutions, like healing, magically appear.
Alicia had to meet the dog. When she did, she caressed his head. They immediately loved each other. He became her close companion as she sat in her room singing along to old Spanish songs on the radio. This was all she could remember. Alzheimer's disease had fogged her memories but also eradicated her inexplicable phobias. It seems for Alicia, one horrific malady cured another, though no one knows for sure, if she ever tolerated feathers.
(Magaly at Poets United has directed us to write a story about phobias. Mine 's a mix of a little fiction, a little truth.)
A bittersweet story, the dreaded disease at least affording her some happiness and comfort at the end of her journey. I am glad she finally knew a dog's love. I loved this story, Myrna.
ReplyDeleteA conditioned phobia. I wonder what inspired her parents to use a feather, and how they could ever think this would turn out all right (especially before moving to the city. I suspect before that, there feathers were quite common around her). I really like that she was able to move beyond her fear of dogs. I feel terrible about the way things ended for her. But hey, like the narrator says, illness is never ideal, but... if we can get something good out of it, even if tiny, we might as well take it.
ReplyDeleteOh, this is heartbreaking. And hopeful...it makes me wonder where the fear of feathers came from.
ReplyDeleteOuch.
ReplyDeleteI am more afraid of dementia than of fur or feathers. This is a heartbreaking tale (with a smidge of comfort mixed in).
Oh what a wonderful story, Myrna. One which I am glad that you told. I am glad that at the end of her life's journey she was able to have a relationship with a dog. And, if only they had worked on her fear of feathers....and her fear of dogs earlier in life. I enjoy your prose, Myrna! So much depth in your words.
ReplyDeleteOh, poor Alicia! I'm so glad she eventually knew the love of a dog. A wonderful story, both disturbing and heart-warming.
ReplyDeleteI have to wonder if her parents ever felt any remorse for the way they conditioned her to fear. It's awful that it took a thing like Alzheimer's to get over that. At least the dog's love comes without strings.
ReplyDeleteJust as I thought the story was going to have a happy ending the dreaded disease popped its head. So sad. Only consolation is that she at least loved and was loved by a dog. A beautiful story Myrna.
ReplyDeleteWhen I read the title of your story I thought, yes, I can understand a fear of dogs, I’ve known plenty of people who had that, but why feathers? And then I read the story and realised that I caused a similar phobia in my sister with buttons. I told her the story of Peer Gynt, with the Button-moulder, who wants to melt down Peer's soul with other faulty goods, and would place a line of buttons across the bedroom door when I didn’t want her to come in. She still doesn't like buttons on her clothes. I like the part when Alicia makes friends with the dog and they immediately love each other. I imagine that Alzheimer's could eradicate phobias, which is so sad, because it takes away everything else too.
ReplyDeleteThis is such a bitter-sweet rendition, Myrna! It makes me think one should bear in mind before restricting s child .. in Alicia's case her earliest memory of a feather stayed with her and continued to frighten her.
ReplyDeleteWow, a bittersweet story! It's sad when Alzheimer's takes this precious gift, memories. But what is comforting about your story is the love and companionship she gained from the dog.
ReplyDeleteThis was beautifully told Myrna. It is so sad to think that one horrific malady cured another. Love the photo of the dog too. Wonderful that she did become companions with the dog.
ReplyDeleteOh, my, way to create a boundary, a feather. That's so sad. Oh, what joy the precious dog brought her in days of withering into forgetting. Love the story, but I brought a few tears.
ReplyDeleteWhat a beautiful but sad read which miraculously was solved in her old age by one she feared the most.
ReplyDeletewhat a moving tale.
ReplyDeleteAlicia's mother, maybe unwittingly, had forever changed her daughter's life. and in the end it takes a dreadful malady to erase one.
this is a tale that brings a tear or two to my eyes.